Top 10 CGI Films
10. Beowulf (2007)
Ever wondered what Ray Winstone would look like with a six-pack and a mean predilection for fighting a ‘Mohnnstarr’? Us neither. Ever wondered what a naked Angelina Jolie would look like with no nipples and a cat’s tail? Us too! A great action film from Back to the Future director Robert Zemeckis, taking the old Anglo-Saxon epic and making it cool for the yuff of today, innit.
9. Ratatouille (2007)
Breaking every health and safety rule known to man, this tale of an aspiring rat chef and filling it with a sewer’s worth of humour and spectacle. It’s also serviceable to Pixar that they managed to make those food-shaped polygons that Remy the Rat creates so fiendishly appetising. It’s amazing that the film ever saw the light of day at all, given that the original director left the project far into production. It would’ve taken longer for replacement director, Brad Bird, to make beans on toast than the amount of time he had left to rewrite and direct this sublime slice of cinema.
8. Monsters Inc. (2001)
If you ever thought the scariest monster that John Goodman encountered was Roseanne Barr on a weekly basis, then… well, you’d be right. But as Sully, the blue-furred monster in Monsters Inc., a child is just about the scariest thing he ever encountered. Now if that isn’t a metaphor for growing-up and becoming a parent then we don’t know what one is. Luckily, it’s also colourful enough to keep everyone entertained throughout, and that climatic door chase is just inspired.
7. Ice Age (2002)
Ice Age is quite a crude CGI ‘toon, not in tone but just in style. Yet, this Three Men and a Baby rip-off was just what those kiddies wanted back in 2002 and has fast become one of those franchises that seems to print money. Manny, Sid and Diego have become quite a fierce threesome, managing to survive the Ice Age, the melting ice caps and 3D. This franchise is far from extinct.
6. Finding Nemo (2003)
Ellen DeGeneres has managed to annoy generations of television viewers, so it was new territory when she set her sights on cinema and your unknowing offspring. Yet, somehow, the fishy fish Dory was just about one of the funniest CGI creations to ever hit the screen. It was also the most visually gorgeous animated efforts ever. If ocean creatures were really that bright and colorful then we’d all be down there. Instead it’s full of discarded crisp packets and unwanted cats.
5. Shrek 1 & 2 (2001)
When we were first told that Wayne Rooney was going to play the lead in a new hit film from Dreamworks then we couldn’t believe. Then followed the announcement that Sarah Jessica Parker would be playing his comedy sidekick and we found ourselves assuming the worst. Somehow Shrek became an international hit, spawning three sequels and making Parker and Rooney household names again. Parker has since had a baby with Sporty Spice and Rooney went on to ruin the hopes and dreams of everyone in the history of the world, ever.
4. Wall-E (2008)
If Apple made romantic comedies… then it probably wouldn’t look like this. That’s because Wall-E has a point, telling a story of isolation and finding love in the most unexpected places. It also has a message about the environment or some bullshit like that (boooo!). Who couldn’t help but get all misty-eyed with Johnny 5-wannabe Wall-E gets a battering before the end? It’s emotional porn wrapped in children’s entertainment, dammit!
3. Toy Story 1 &2 (1995)
The first foray into CGI animation, delivering a story of a secret world of toys, just doing their daily grind at the office – which, just happens to be a toybox – as they serve their omnipotent overlord, all in the hopeless pursuit of acceptance. Toy Story was deep stuff. The sequel improved on that: exploring feelings of rejection, growing old and legacy. This isn’t just a a fairytale, it was a story for adults. It also has Tim Allen in it; isn’t The Santa Clause great? It’s got Judge Reinhold in it and everything.
2. Up (2009)
The most depressing five minutes to ever grace the silver screen and it’s in a kid’s movie. Yet, the rest of the movie is a colourful adventure, taking a geriatric grump on a globe-trotting adventure with a talking dog, Emu and a fat Asian kid. This list has fast become our favourite Pixar movies but Up isn’t just one of the best animated movies of the last decade but flat out one of the best films. Frankly, anything with a talking dog in it gets our vote. That’s why Homeward Bound II: Lost in San Francisco is our bestest movie ever!
1. The Incredibles (2004)
A superhero movie at number 1, hecklerspray? How grimly predictable. If it doesn’t have spandex, explosions or made before 1990 then you don’t care, do you? Actually, it’s a rather brilliant movie. Following The Iron Giant, Brad Bird followed-up that animated masterstroke with a superior story of the power of family. Or is that a family of powers?
The reason it gets the top spot? Because it’s the only animated movie on the list that we’d love to see a live action version of. It probably wouldn’t be a spot on the original but seeing Frozone, Mr. Incredible, Elastigirl and co. strut their stuff again would be, well, super.